Accepting Resumes Today

April 5, 2012

Wanted: State Republican Party Chairman
Must be able to raise massive amounts of money immediately. Must not be so pushy about it that he or she alienates donors.
Must have a track record of gainful employment or head up a successful business to prove that he or she is in touch with economic issues. Should have family with children to showcase family values. Must be able to attend all fifty-five county Lincoln Day Dinners, as well as any other function that the Republican Party or Tea Party may require.
Must also be available any time for consultation on any issue.
Must have connection to power brokers in Washington DC. Must not be too close to power brokers in Washington DC.
Must understand the special needs of Charleston and Kanawha County. Must not concentrate too much on the needs of Charleston and Kanawha County.
Must work well with elected officials, especially Republicans in the State Legislature. Must be seen to be independent of elected officials, especially Republicans in the State Legislature.
Must administer the party according to standards of frugality. Must not make the party look cheap.
Must have a strong background of Republican Party or conservative experience. Must have no electoral ambitions.
Must aggressively push state and local party officials to do their utmost to support the party and its candidates. Must not be too pushy so as to risk offending state and local party officials.
Must be perfect in all cases whatsoever.
Salary: $0.00


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